Blood and Guts. Tom Gets Eviscerated.

Here's a sentence I never thought I'd get to say using the proper, literal definition of each word.

This is a picture of my friend Anthony eviscerating me.

e·vis·cer·ate

verb (used with object), e·vis·cer·at·ed, e·vis·cer·at·ing. 1. to remove the entrails from; disembowel:

Source:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OBszPLJDVA

Really ruined those pants...

I am going to finish this damn horror script - LURKING Continued

I am still jamming on this horror script, I am nowhere near meeting a feature length requirement but I am probably just going to wrap this up in a few more pages. There's so little dialogue that it's hard to really say how long this script would play on screen and I can always add more. This will be a sample size script.

Lurking pt. 1-8

-LURKING Pt. 9-

Exterior - Evening

Darcy stands up, she's finally motivated by fear to get her boat moving. Cade isn't coming back, he's gone. The high pitched sounds of the creature penetrate the coming dawn, she runs to her sail. Through trial and error she's finally figured out how to hoist her sail and lock down the rigging, she's not a perfect sailor and can't navigate very well but she's only interested in moving, she needs to get out of this spot where she's been stalked every single night by some horrible monster who she believes killed her fiance. Darcy can see movement in the water, something is streaking towards her fast enough to kick up waves. Darcy fumbles with her ropes, she's tired, stressed out and panicking. It's getting darker and she's losing light. The monster's been sizing her boat up for days, each night becoming more comfortable exploring the boat. Darcy knows that if she's stuck here for one more night with this thing she won't see another morning, it will find her and eviscerate her.

She snaps everything into place and almost instantly feels movement for the first time in a weeks, the wind picks up and soon she's quickly heading away from danger. She hears the call of the creature getting further and further away as the sun starts to set on the horizon. The only thing indicating the place in the water where she suffered through her most unimaginable nightmare is a small scattering debris from her boat. That's the closest thing Cade will get to a tombstone marking his grave, he's lost forever out here.

Darcy lets the wind take her as far it can as night falls, Darcy is exhausted. She hasn't slept in days, she's a wreck. She's barely keeping herself together and it's likely that even if she survives to see land again; she'll never be the same. The movement of the boat is equally calming and terrifying. It's the reason she was able to escape a creature that will haunt her nightmares for as long as she lives but on the other hand this wind could be pushing her further and further away from the shore. Darcy's slumps over against the cabin and slides to the floor, she has nothing left. Her head slowly falls to her shoulders, he eyes never quite shut. If she closes them she'll see him, Cade. Standing on the water asking her to come back for him, asking her why she left him. She finally fades, her body relaxes. It's quiet. Darcy rests for the first time.

SLAM! Chaos. Darcy and everything on the boat are violently thrown forward, the boat was hit hard by something under the water.  Darcy is hurt and buried by falling debris. It's here. It followed her boat, it won't leave her alone. Won't let her escape. Darcy's pathetic and well worn voice can only let out a squeak.

Darcy

No.

-Cont'd-

My Push For 10,000 Views Begins - Here's a Sick Little Gangster Movie Promo

I shot a short film over the weekend. 

I'll post the full version as soon as I can and I'll be getting back into the swing of writing everyday from now on. I've just been feeling beat up lately, I was on set shooting for 22 hours that day and I am just now recovering. That's the thing about these 48 Hour Film challenges, you work in the hot sun or a warm office for damn near an entire 24 hour day; eating junk food for every meal and then you put that fat, puffy, sweaty, tired looking, worn out face on camera for everyone to see and judge. Goodbye vanity.

-Thomas Holler-

Welcome New Viewers

As my view count has been increasing over the last few weeks I figure now's a good time to re-introduce myself and what this blog's all about.

My name is Thomas Holler and this blog's purpose is to kick me in the ass and get me writing more. I work in a day to day office job that eats up almost all my damn time and I needed something to motivate me to write. Writing is something I've always done, I went to school for media and focused on creative writing and communications. When the economy fell through the floor and left most of us feeling insecure about this marketplace I made the decision to try to build a more professional resume in the field of business, or administration or something corporate. Anything that felt more secure than TV and media did at the time, so I walked away and got a job at a bank. It's a decision I made out of self preservation but it's one that's never sat well. I was a dreamer once, I wanted to create my own films and now here I find myself working the least creative job a man can have. Corporate admin. I like the security it offers and there are perks to being in a big company but it's something I feel like I can never have my heart 100% invested in. My dream is to write. I want to work from home, I want to get paid based on something that I create myself. I want to wake up, make breakfast and sit down in my office in my underwear and start writing and have THAT be how I start each morning rather than racing to get on the disgusting subway everyday.


Hence this blog. It's a place where I can come when I feel inspired, its a place where I can work out ideas and collect an archive of scripts. It's worked too, I am currently putting a production called DOPE together based on a series of scripts I wrote early in the site's history. I've developed ideas for internet shorts called House Arrested which I'll come back to one day and came up with a short script about a brutal anti-hero. One day I'll come up with a link for all the scripts and articles I've written on here but that won't be tonight. Tonight I should actually be in bed getting ready to hop on the disgusting subway.

I'll be back tomorrow trying to write a romantic comedy script...it's not going well so far. I am just not feeling my first Rom Com idea, I need a new one. Tomorrow I am going to try to come up with a really good synopsis for a romantic comedy that I love enough to really want to dive in to the script. Tonight I am going to bed.

-Thomas Holler-

The Beautiful - Written by and staring Thomas Holler

And here's a GREAT little horror I was in hosted by horrorpalace.com, just click this pic.

THE SECOND TIME BEN GOT STABBED

I had to run outside in the bitter cold of winter at 12 am just to get some STUPID margarine.

HOUSE ARRESTED - A peek inside a house where a robber, a gangster, a psychopath and an innocent man are all under house arrest and can't leave.

Yeah I dropped the cop from the show.



BENJAMIN and CONRAD and in the kitchen, BENJAMIN's cooking at the stove.

CONRAD
YOU DON'T MAKE SOMEONE ELSE'S EGGS BENJAMIN!

BENJAMIN
I'll make you some.

CONRAD
YOU WILL ONLY MAKE ME SOME, no one else is eating my eggs. Why the HELL are you touching them?

BENJAMIN goes to answer but CONRAD's still going, he cuts him off.

CONRAD
How about I touch something of yours! How about I touch your bread!

CONRAD pulls out a whole load of bread from the pantry and stomps on it.

CONRAD
And your bullshit cookies.

CONRAD stomps the box to the ground, he continues to destroy all the food BENJAMIN has and some of his shirts.

CONRAD
It was STUPID of you to touch my eggs. It was STUPID of you to touch my eggs.

ANDRE rounds the corner into the kitchen.

ANDRE
Yo, are those my eggs?

ANDRE takes the eggs from BENJAMIN's hand, noticing the mess but not acknowledging it.

CONRAD
What are you doing?

ANDRE
I asked BENJAMIN to make me some eggs.

CONRAD
He used MY eggs.

ANDRE
You don't have eggs, you traded me all of yours for a favor.

CONRAD
What favor?

ANDRE
I told you if you traded me your eggs I would protect you from JEREMEY.

CONRAD
And you didn't he stabbed me last week.

BENJAMIN
Wait a minute, you told me that you'd protect me from JEREMEY if I made you breakfast.

ANDRE
Don't worry, I've got my eye out for him.

ANDRE walks away.

They're silent for a second, BENJAMIN smiles, he's about to say something when JEREMEY bursts out from underneath the table and stabs him in the stomach with the scissors.

 

BENJAMIN

OH GOD!

THIS CAME OUT OF MY BRAIN!

HOUSE ARRESTED - An internet series about a group of guys under house arrest and the dumb officer who's in charge of them.

CONRAD (mean), ANDRE (clever), BENJAMIN (innocent), JEREMEY (psycho).


Webcam - Officer Carp's room

OFFICER CARP

This is police constable Allan Carp with a video report for the stabbing attack that occurred recently at this location. The attack involved BENJAMIN Baroney who was the victim in this incident, BENJAMIN was convicted of being an accessory to a felony. His attacker was JEREMEY Fish who's under psychic evaluation while staying here. He's diagnosed as an extreme schizophrenic. This incident was as follows.  

Security footage - Kitchen table - BENJAMIN and JEREMEY are eating lunch, JEREMEY is taking keen interest in BENJAMIN.

JEREMEY

There's goblins inside you.

BENJAMIN looks perplexed, he tries to ignore it. JEREMEY makes him uncomfortable.

JEREMEY

I hate goblins. They get inside you and take your food away.

BENJAMIN

Hey, have you been taking your medication?

ANDRE runs into the room, he's worried and grabs a nearby broom as a weapon. 

ANDRE

JEREMEY, you're taking your medication right?

JEREMEY doesn't answer, his eyes are locked on BENJAMIN.

CONRAD strolls into the room.

ANDRE

Careful CONRAD, JEREMEY might be off his medication.

CONRAD

Yeah I never really saw the big deal about that. Have you seen him? What's the worst he can do really?

JEREMEY

Hey CONRAD?

CONRAD

What's up?

JEREMEY

There's goblins in BENJAMIN's stomach

CONRAD

Yeah probably

ANDRE

Don't encourage him, this guy's crazy.

CONRAD

No he's not, BENJAMIN put goblins in his stomach; he told me.

JEREMEY

He did?

CONRAD

Oh yeah.

BENJAMIN

No. CONRAD he's getting excited, we should probably stop now.

ANDRE

Yeah it's not funny dude. JEREMEY, no matter what the voices you're hearing are telling you; BENJAMIN doesn't have any goblins in his stomach

JEREMEY

Is that true CONRAD?

CONRAD

I don't believe it.

BENJAMIN

CONRAD!

ANDRE

ITS NOT FUNNY, this is serious.

JEREMEY

Show me your belly.

BENJAMIN is hesitant but eventually complies and lifts his shirt for JEREMEY.

ANDRE

See, no goblins. 

BENJAMIN

Can we stop this now? 

CONRAD

No! I am still not convinced.

ANDRE 

CONRAD!

CONRAD

WHAT? This is funny. So he thinks BENJAMIN has goblins inside of him. Maybe he does, maybe we all do. You need to calm do...

Before he can finish his sentence JEREMEY makes a move towards BENJAMIN and plunges a pair of scissors into his stomach. Everyone reacts with horror. ANDRE jumps on JEREMEY.

BENJAMIN 

Oh god!

Webcam - Officer Carp's room

OFFICER CARP

Luckily for BENJAMIN the scissors didn't penetrate deeply and he was treated. I've recommended we move JEREMEY from the house but no one will take him. BENJAMIN maintains there were no goblins in his belly.

CALL OF DUTY BLACK OPS 2 TOMORROW!!! also here's my breakdown.

I am back from vacation and Call of Duty comes out tomorrow!! Think about that for a second, we just had a long weekend and Call of Duty comes out on the Tuesday AFTER the long weekend. THINK ABOUT THAT!!!! Why??????? Why? Am I supposed to take time off work to go pick it up? WHY? There was a perfectly good Friday or Saturday release date right there for the taking but they decide to wait until TUESDAY? It makes no sense to me.


Anyway check this out, I was playing Uncharted 3 for the first time in a while and I was getting ready to take a pic of the screen to show to a friend who just recently finished the game. Just as I clicked the button to take the picture I was shot dead, I figured that I only got a pic of the death screen. That black and white screen you get when your character dies...however I got this instead. The exact SECOND that I was shot dead, captured on camera.

And here's how the show is coming along:

The House Arrested is an internet comedy consisting of 2-8 minute videos which revolve around the happenings of a correctional house where the occupants are convicted felons all under house arrest as told by Police Constable Benjamin Carp.

Character Descriptions:

Tom - Arrested for Grand Larceny when he tried to crack a bank machine. Tom is of above average intelligence but displays signs of paranoia and a petty lust for revenge.

Anthony - Arrested for Assault and bribery. Anthony is well connected outside of the house, he's an "acquisitions specialist" making his money and reputation on being able to get anything he's payed to get. He's able to smuggle whatever he wants into the house.

Matthew - Matthew was the unwilling accomplice during a robbery and high speed chase when his friend robbed a McDonalds and sped off with Matthew in the car. He is completely out of place and hated throughout the house.

Jerome - Arrested for Assault, Stalking, Breaking and Entering and threats of violence. Jerome is psychotic and under constant psychiatric evaluation. He lives in the house as a means of rehabilitation, trying to get him interacting with others.

Richard - Arrested for Fraud and Embezzlement. Richard was an investment banker who defrauded his shareholders and clients, he is highly educated and exerts and air of superiority towards the common riff-raff he's forced to live and interact with.

Police Constable Benjamin Carp - Benjamin is the house authority, his duty is to maintain order and administration within the house and report back to his superiors. He isn't particularly competent and is easily manipulated by the inmates.

GOOD NEWS AND A GORY VIDEO FOR HALLOWEEN!

One quick update.

It appears our gory horror video called Cleaver has been noticed by the people at www.horrorpalace.com and will be featured there in the coming weeks.

In the meantime it can be viewed here at:

https://www.youtube.com/user/theBeautifulTV

I've also linked the youtube channel to this blog.

Anyway, I am going to try to write my script tonight or at least get through my character descriptions.

THE TIME I CAUGHT THE NORWALK VIRUS WHILE TESTING PLAYSTATIONS

So I've decided to tie the new idea I am writing into a previous one I wrote called the Beautiful.

I want to use the same two main character and the big guy who shoots the undercover cop. I am not even going to reference back to the show but this gives me some character points to write from. I have the cop character sort of worked out in my head but I am still chewing on ideas for the rest of the inmates/house arrested, so I have nothing to add. I hate it when I don't have a script page to add; I consider it a failure. Writing scripts for me couldn't be more organic, I literally just write out the things I've been daydreaming about; a chimp could write the way I do. I try to come up with an idea and characters that are fun to daydream about and go, that process isn't working right now and I think it's because I am forcing it. So I am going to relax and let it come when it comes, should be soon.

Just so I actually do have something halfway amusing to add to this site I'll share with you a very short story about the worst day I ever worked that should have been the best day I ever worked.

THE TIME I CAUGHT THE NORWALK VIRUS WHILE TESTING PLAYSTATIONS

This was a long time ago and I was working for a department store called Liquidation World in Ajax, Ontario. Liquidation World was a store that got all sorts of liquidated items from all over Canada and sold them at a discount, usually food, furniture, paint, toys, candles, glassware, everything. Electronics came in from time to time and it was always a big deal, especially one particular day when we were due to get a shipment of playstations and playstation games. This was back when the first PS was still new and expensive, we just took on a whole inventory of returned systems and it was MY JOB THAT DAY TO PLAY THE PLAYSTATIONS, PLAY ALL THE GAMES AND MAKE SURE THEY WORKED. That ALL deserved to be in caps so do even question me on that. God's funny. Right as I was setting up the systems in the break room I felt myself getting more and more dizzy, I felt like there was something badly wrong with my stomach. It felt like I ate a baseball, I got sicker and sicker as I sat down and turned on the first game. It was Tekken, I loved Tekken and it worked perfectly. What I had was the Norwalk virus, a NASTY little bugger of a flu bug that made a man vomit uncontrollably. I don't remember how long I was able to stick around and play those video games because all I do remember is spending about an hour in the bathroom throwing up before someone called my dad to come pick me up. We drove right to the hospital and I threw up in the waiting room and left after being there for over an hour. I spent the next eight hours throwing up every 20 minutes, I would even be woken up from a deep sleep with the jarring instinct to run to the toilet. When I returned to work four days later it was my job to help unload a hot, dirty furniture truck. Thomas Holler.

HOUSE ARRESTED SCRIPT - ROUGH LOGLINE

So this is my initial idea for the next script I am going to write, this is meant to be the basis for a few internet short comedies. I wanted to come up with something that's SUPER basic in terms of filming but is able to both justify the feel of small production values and provide an idea that can be mined for lots and lots of comedy. This will be shot with a webcam and a stationary cam set up that will be filmed like security cam footage, that means it's easy to shoot and easy to edit.

The House Arrested

The House Arrested is a comedy about a group of outcast, low level criminals who live in a shared residence under the supervision of Police Constable Benjamin Carp. The show is presented through  webcam video reports to his bosses about the day's events, cut with the house's security camera footage.

Day 1: When a democratic voting process is adopted for day to day house decisions each inmate tries to gain power by forming secret alliances and making back room deals. Only they're AWFUL at it. Constantly confusing which deals and alliances they've agreed to, the housemates have to resort to a contentious sit down discussion to work it all out.


I spelled contentious right on my first try BTW.

DOPE - Pitch Package

APE

So I just finished my whole pitch package for DOPE (Department of Paranormal Events) and I am too paranoid to put it on the net like I planned so...too bad.

Also I broke my phone and I feel like CRAP over it. A mug fell out of my cupboard and landed right on my phone, it was traumatic and I am still  not over it. When I saw the cracks in the glass on my phone I almost cried, that's $110 that I can't afford; down the drain. CLASSIC Thomas Holler.

CHECK OUT THIS STORY PREMISE

DOPE is a show that I came up with and like to write episodes for. Imagine Ghostbusters except it's all government controlled. The Department of Paranormal Events (DOPE) is a low level branch of the government where the three protagonists work.

Anyway check out this one episode premise because I am proud of it:

Rooney, Ervin and Randall are chased into a small cabin by a pack of vampires and Randall has been bitten. They can hold up until sunset when the vampires would retreat but if they do that then Randall would die and become one of them. He needs the vampire virus cure which is in the standard DOPE medical kit in their car and he needs it ASAP.

Rooney and Randall risk certain death at the hands of a ravenous pack of wild vampires. Electing to save their friend Ervin constructs a plan to draw the attention of the vampires from within the cabin allowing Rooney to escape out back. Rooney has to race through a kilometer of vampire territory at night to find their car and get it back to Ervin who was left to fortify and protect the cabin from a pack of strong and frenzied vampires who are determined to tear their way inside where Randall lays helpless and dying on the floor; bound to turn into a deadly vampire himself at any minute.

I HAVE A RECURRING DAYDREAM - 2

I am continuing this story, check out my last entry if you're interested in catching up.

----------------------------------------

Cont'd

The man takes a moment, the room is quiet and very dark. He gets up off the floor onto his knees, he turns towards the door and stops. Staring back at him is the barrel end of a dirty shotgun, it's held by a scumbag in a white t-shirt with blood stains all over it. Her blood. He speaks.

"You're in big trouble."

The scumbag pulls the trigger, the bullet goes through the man's mouth and explodes out the back of his head. He slumps backwards, his eyes seem impossibly focused and locked on his killer's as he falls backwards. The scumbag is startled, he runs out to the backyard where 2 other men are loading up their truck with stolen items, one of them is trying to wash the blood off of his face. Beside him is a large knife.

SCUMBAG 1
There's someone here

The men drop what they're doing in a panic and rush to their weapons. There's confusion.

SCUMBAG 1
He's inside with the girl, I don't know who he was. I shot him in the head, he's dead.

The night is dark, the house is almost pitch black. One can barely make out the figures as they cautiously stalk the house towards the room where the mysterious stranger had been murdered. The soft light of the room with the two bodies illuminates the group as they inch closer, they see the body of the girl first and don't even react. Towards the far wall they see the slumped body of someone else, dressed all in black.

His upright feet obscure their viewpoint, they move closer...there's movement. They all ready their weapons and step forward, the scumbag with the shotgun is forced to take point. As he gets closer he see's clearly that the man on the floor is breathing, he's breathing very fast. There's a growling sound, something primal and inhuman. He spasms, his growling gets ferocious. He's waking up.

The two man in back's faces have gone white. They recognize the mask, they know exactly who this is. They are in BIG trouble.

"IT'S COCKROACH, RUN!!!!!!!"

To be concluded.

-APE-

FEELING UNINSPIRED

Yeah, that's a pretty good representation of how I've felt lately, just uninspired and unmotivated to work and wow; that orangutang (spelled that right on the first try btw) eats pretty healthy doesn't he?

I plan on writing more new material soon, I actually kind of have to but lately I've just been blanking. I am in a funk, sometimes I get in funks. I'll pop out of it soon, the weekend starts tomorrow so hopefully I can be productive. I WILL be productive.

I was going through my old catalog of scripts and damn, I've actually written a lot. A show about middle class people who start a gang, a short about someone not being sure what his background is so he and his pal go on a borderline racist quest to find out if he's black or not (they play basketball and dance) and here's on oldie I dug out:

A little story about a guy who woke up after a party and realized a woman had raped him, he's on a quest to either have her arrested or to get her number. It totally depends on whether or not she's hot. I'm not crazy about it to be honest, I like the concept so it's worth revising someday.

OPEN: Tom and Chip are sitting with a middle aged, no nonsense cop. He’s at his desk and Tom and Chip are sitting across from him in chairs. Chip has a black eye.

COP

So I am to understand that your friend here was raped?

The camera pans around to see TOM and CHIP sitting there.

CHIP

Yes, that's correct.

TOM

By a girl. I want to make that very clear! That much I am sure of.

CHIP

He called me early this morning and confided in me what happened. I am the one who advised him to come here.

COP

And you are?

CHIP

I am Chip, I am a friend of his and I was with him on the night in question but I left before the incident happened.

COP

I see. Do we know who did this to you mr...?

TOM

Tom, and no. That's the problem.

COP

Do you feel you were drugged?

TOM

I think so, I remember it happening but I kept passing out. I had one drink that night and it was bought for me by some girl in green. I just remember lots of green.

COP

Well we'll certainly look into this, we'll need details to help us find this person. So you'll be looking to press charges then?

TOM

Well that totally depends what she looks like

COP

Why should that have any bearing on this case?

TOM

Because if she's pretty then I have no problem with what she did.

CHIP

No, why would you? At that point it's just annoying that she roofied you and made you forget everything.

COP

legally speaking it's a serious offense regardless of appearance.

CHIP

But morally speaking, it's only wrong if she's ugly.

TOM

Yeah if this girl turns out to be ugly I want her locked up like a little pig for touching me. That's a horrible thing to do to someone, do you understand what a violation like that feels like?

COP

And if she's attractive?

TOM

Then how lucky am I? Honestly.

CHIP

Oh my god. If she turns out to be sexy can you imagine? You could write a penthouse letter about that. If she's attractive it goes from being a tragic story about someone taking advantage of you to something we can all high five about.

TOM

Seriously if she turns out to be attractive then all I want from you is her contact info.

COP

That’s not how this works. What information can you give me?

TOM

It happened at a bar in Peterborough

COP

Peterborough?

He looks quizzically at his form.

COP

According to this that’s at 4 hour drive from your home. Why were you all the way up there?

CHIP

Irrelevant

COP

I’ll decide what’s relevant.

TOM

We were just driving around.

COP

Why were you on those roads.

CHIP

Don’t tell him. WE PLEAD THE 5^TH.

TOM

You’re making it sound so much worse

COP

Somebody tell me what you were doing on a country road at near 2 in the morning! What were you planning on doing all the way out there in the middle of nowhere?

TOM

Burying a cat.

COP

You killed a cat?

TOM

You just assume that?

CHIP

No one killed the cat, it was my cat. I loved that cat.

COP

You drove 3 hours out of the city to bury your cat?

CHIP

(Irritable)

I would have driven for days if that’s how long it took to find a beautiful spot. What do you do with your cats; throw them in a dumpster?

One of the other officers in the room whispers to COP

COP

My associate just informed me that we responded to a domestic disturbance call that same night, the complainee said that two men were burying some trash in his yard and got into a physical confrontation with him. He’s on his way right now to file a complaint, why don’t you two stick around for that.

TOM

I am filing a complaint against him. He was way over the top, he threw a dead cat at me.

CUT to footage of the man approaching Tom and Chip as they begin to dig a ditch on his property. An argument ensues, Tom picks up the dead cat and throws it at the man, the man catches it and throws it back at Tom, hitting him. Chip freaks out over his cat being tossed around.  The man tells them to find someplace else.

COP

Something tells me you’re going to be here a while. Why don’t you finish your story. After you and your friend here were through burying your friend’s cat what did you do?

CHIP

I said a few words. Something off the cuff I believe.

Cut to shot of Tom and Chip in a nice field, standing by a small grave. Chip pulls out several tear soaked pages of paper and begins to read his eulogy.

COP

And then you headed to the bar?

CHIP

Yes

CUT to a shot back at the house where they had the confrontation with The MAN, Tom and Chip pull up and sneak out of their car and towards the house. Once they get there CHIP sneaks up to the man’s front door and starts peeing on it.

CUT to the 3 of them arguing on the doorstep after the man answers the door

CUT to Tom pulling out of the driveway fast with the man chasing them with a bat. Chip is unconscious in the back seat. Tom pulls into a bar and sits down at the bar. A woman voice says “Excuse me, you look like you had a hard day, want a drink?” and we fade out to the police station.

TOM

I go in, I sit down and someone hands me a drink. I don’t remember who, I can’t remember any faces. I just remember green. She was wearing green. We ended up back at my place, I remember bits and pieces of what she did to me but I was almost completely out of it. I don’t remember if she was hot or not.

COP

Once again we will not discriminate based on a person’s physical appearance, a crime is a crime whether you’re attractive or not. Is that understood?

TOM

Not really

CHIP

It makes no sense to me.

TOM

One the one hand, if she’s unattractive; or you know what? Even if she’s just kind of average, then what she did is sickening. I’ll never get over that. But on the other hand if she’s really hot I get over it pretty quickly

COP

I am no longer interested in helping you.

SCENE 2: Tom and Chip are driving

TOM

That’s why I didn’t want to go to the police in the first place.

CHIP

Well if there’s one good thing that come out of it; it’s that it jogged our memory. Now we can head back to that bar and ask some question.

TOM

And if there’s one bad thing to come out of it?

CHIP

Then it would probably be all the fines we ended up getting.

TOM
How much did yours total out to?

CHIP

A little under a thousand dollars.

TOM

Mine was only half that but you flipped them off on the way out.

CHIP

That was costly.

CUT to chip flipping the police off as he leaves, only to be tackled and re-arrested.

CHIP

So what if we find this girl? What are you going to say to her?

TOM

I am going to say “You sick twisted bitch. You’re the scum of the Earth. Someone who preys on other people. Someone...

CHIP

...Someone so vile, so weak , you can’t even control your own urges? Go die.

TOM

You DRUG me to get me into bed? You disgusting cow. You’re ROBBED me of my peace of mind. FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE, I will never have peace of mind again because of what you did to me. You bitch, you criminal. I hate you. You’ve destroyed my life, I’ll NEVER put this back together again. A piece will always be missing, A PIECE YOU STOLE. I HOPE YOU DIE!

CHIP

Ok but what if she turns out to be hot

TOM

I am going to be like...What’s going on? Ummm, I had a good time last night. You didn’t have to drug (laughs) you didn’t have to drug me but mistakes happen aaaand if you want to get together again sometime here’s my cell number. Feel free to call it.

CHIP

That sounds good.

SCENE 4: Tom and Chip pull up to a bar and get out, they enter and walk around for a little bit. Checking out the people.

Close up on Tom as we hear a familiar voice.

WAITRESS 1

Oh hey it’s you again.

WAITRESS 1 is absolutely beautiful and dressed in an all green waitress uniform.

TOM

Excuse me?

WAITRESS 1

I am so sorry for what I did, I hope you’re okay. I had a lot of fun with you last night, I know you’re probably mad but I just need you to know that.

Beat.

TOM

Oh no...no no no, don’t worry about it. I am fine. It was a bit weird but I am glad you did it. It was a lot of fun actually. If I am being totally honest I am hoping we can make it happen again, but I don’t want to put any pressure on you.

WAITRESS 1

Not at all, I’ll go get her for you.

TOM

What?

WAITRESS 1

My co-worker Cathy. I am so glad to hear that you guys hit it off, she didn’t say anything about it when we talked so I wasn’t sure. Again I am sorry I passed you off onto her but she liked and I already have a boyfriend.

CATHY enters from the back wearing the same green uniform.  She’s very unattractive. She sees Tom.

CATHY

Oh shit

CATHY looks at Tom, mouth agape. Waitress 1 looks at Cathy, smiling. Tom looks at waitress 1 and then over to Cathy slowly, his shocked face turning to disgust.

Beat

TOM

You sick twisted bitch...

END