APE: A Box Full of Bugs and a Computer Full of Dicks

Sunday, December 8, 2013

A Box Full of Bugs and a Computer Full of Dicks

Part 1, 2, 3, 4

CONT'D...

This picture represents the level of gravity I want this

scene to have.

INT-KITCHEN

Conrad and Andre are in the kitchen, Officer Karp is out back having a smoke, Benjamin and Gordon are in the living room, Jeremy is in the background looking closely at the walls, lifting up shoes, staring at the ground, digging around in every nook he comes across. Everyone is watching everyone else.

Andre is sitting at the table eating cereal, Conrad sits next to him. He speaks like someone who doesn't want to be heard by other ears, hiding behind the cereal box as best he can.

CONRAD

We need to talk.
What are your thoughts on what just went down in there?

ANDRE

I think you're the one who put a picture of his dick on the internet.

CONRAD

Wrong, I stopped doing that a while ago.

That's not what we need to talk about.

ANDRE

Alright, what then?

CONRAD

This box of bugs. Can you believe we have something like that in play now?

ANDRE

I don't like bugs Conrad.

CONRAD

I don't like knowing that someone like Jeremy has a box FULL of bugs at his disposal. What if he wanted to weaponize this?

ANDRE

Is that what you'd do?

CONRAD

YES! and you'd be afraid to cross me. You could wake up one night to find me standing over you with a box full of spiders in my hand. We can't have a weapon like that in this house.

ANDRE

It's like the nuclear option. Just knowing he has that capability..

CONRAD
To cover you in bugs.

ANDRE
Yes. He's not someone I'd trust with that kind of power. With ANY kind of power.

CONRAD

Then let's team up, lets find that box because you know those two can't be trusted with it.
(pointing to Benjamin and Gordon in the living room)

GORDON
(voice from the living room)
Why you pointing at me? It wasn't my dick Conrad.

ANDRE

I am with you on one condition, we destroy the box of bugs when we find it.

CONRAD

Of course.

Conrad straightens up in his chair, as he comes out from behind the cereal box he was using for cover he's startled and horrified to find Jeremy sitting right beside him, clutching something in his hand.

CONRAD

Gaahhh! What are you doing?

JEREMY

I caught a bug.

CONRAD

Eww, and you're holding it with your bare hands?

JEREMY

So? Its just a potato bug see?

Jeremy opens his palm right near Conrad's face.

CONRAD

Bah!

Conrad slaps away Jeremy's hand sending his bug flying onto Andre. Andre jumps up and screams.