Tomorrow I start a new script, it's going to be another DOPE episode (since I actually have to get a bunch of those finished) where zombie training results in a zombie outbreak amongst the staff of the Department of Paranormal Events.
So here's my final first rough draft, there's still a lot I want to change but I am comfortable using this as a working copy to build on. I went back and changed some dialogue and added the feature of Rooney being extra protective of Randall (which will play back to something that happens in the script previous to this).
It's a mix of this:
GHOSTBUSTERS TRAILER (1984)
and this:
30 DAYS OF NIGHT TRAILER
Rooney,Ervin and Randall are running through a forest towards a lonely,secluded little cabin. It's in a dilapidated condition, all three menare panicked and show signs of a struggle. Randall is wearing a bloodsoaked rag around his arm.
Rooney runs right up to the houseand slams himself hard against the door, bouncing off and hurtinghimself, a beat later Ervin smashes through the front door. Rooneyruns inside. Randall stumbles up to the door and almost passes outright at the doorway, Ervin catches him and pulls him in, Rooneyslams the door and presses his body up against it.
Rooney
WHYDID YOU BRING RANDALL?
Ervin
Ididn't know there would be that many!
Randall
DammitRooney I can take care of myself.
Rooney
Yougot BIT Randall
Randall'sarm has been bitten, it's gruesome.
The sound of a hundredvoices moaning and hissing can be heard getting louder and louder,closer and closer. Ervin inspects Randall's bite.
Ervin
Hehave to get this treated immediately, the infection has alreadystarted.
Randall
Canwe cure me before I turn into one of them?
Ervin
Thebites don't turn you immediately, it takes time for the infection tospread. Randall we need to get your to a hospital right now.
Rooney
Ifwe go outside, we DIE!
Ervin
Ifwe stay here HE dies.
Rooney
DOPEthis is Rooney. We need -
Avoice comes over the radio, it's automated
Voiceon the radio
'Dueto a high number of calls your request has been put in prioritysequence, please wait for the next available operator.'
Thethree men share a look
Ervin
Howmany are there?
Rooneylooks out the window of the small cabin, as far as he can see thereare zombie-like vampires pouring out of the woods towards the cabin.The sheer number of the vampire force makes Rooney's face go white.
Rooney
Lots.
Fadeout. Title.
SCENE 2:
INT – Cabin – Night
Asmall cabin, the guys have barricaded the door with what littlefurniture they have, Rooney is pressed against the door holding backthe vampires trying to get in. Ervin is tending to Randall's wounds.
Randal
Canyou keep them from getting in that door?
Rooney
Probablynot
Ervin
Youhave to, everything we have; we used to barricade the windows.
Rooney
Maybeif you didn't break the lock...
Ervin
Wehad to get in didn't we?
Rooney
Wehave to get out, we have to get to the car. Where is it?
Randall
Idon't know, I lost track of it when we started running.
Rooney
Whatdo we have for weapons?
Randall
Ohman, we have our two handed pump action blasters, our ionic poppers,I brought a particle disruptor, some concussion grenades and a bunchof axes.
Ervin
Quickgive me a concussion grenade!
Randall
Allof that's in the car. I have nothing on me.
Ervin
What?
Randall
Whatdo you have?
Ervinsearches his pockets, he finds a lighter.
Rooney
Ok...letmake a torch. Vampires are afraid of fire; right?
Ervin
No
Randall
No
SMASH.A pack of vampires breaks through the window barricade.
Randall
TheWINDOW!
Randalllooks across to see a couple more vampires making their way throughthe window and springs up to re-enforce the window barricade,pressing his body against the old shelves tipped over against thewindow keeping out the invading vampires.
Thevampire in the room lets out a frightening hiss. Rooney jumps up tostand beside Ervin. At the door a hand pokes through the opening, thevampires threaten to break through in a second, Rooney jumps back tothe door and seals it. Ervin on his own has to deal with thevampire.
The vampire pounces on him, Ervin has a deathgrip on it around it's throat and he's pushing it away from his body;keeping it's fangs just out of reach of his jugular. Rooney andRandall are both spending every bit of their focus keeping the restof the monsters outside.
Ervin reverses the position withthe vampire, he's on top and he begins to ground-and-pound it. Thevampire takes a beating but it's incredibly resilient, he screechesat Ervin and mule kicks him across the room. Ervin is slow to get up,in the background we see the vampire pounce at him once again.
Ervinspins around and catches the vamp underneath the armpit and aroundthe head and 'Rock Bottom's him through a nearby table.
Thetable shatters and Ervin grabs a broken fragment. He reaches to thesky and as the vampire roars he strikes down and stabs it in theheart. The vampire starts to glow.
Rooney
Youdid it! He's going to turn into dust now.
Pop.The vampire explodes and his entrails cover the room and all 3 men.All three men take a beat to spit vampire bits out of their mouths.
Voiceon the Radio
'Due to a high number of calls your request has beenput in priority sequence, please wait for the next availableoperator.'
Scene3
INT – Cabin - Night
Ervinis nursing his wounds, Rooney and Randall are manning the barricades.We can hear the vampires howling outside. Rooney takes notice.
Rooney
Thatcan't be good. Do you think they're signaling for more tocome?
Ervin
Eitherthat or they can smell our blood and it's driving them into afrenzy.
Rooney
Ervinthis door isn't going to hold and Randall's passing out at the windowbarricade. We need to make a break for it while he can stillmove.
Randall
It'sabout 4 hours until daybreak, we need to hold out here for as long aswe can.
Rooney
Youreally think we can make it 4 hours?
Ervindoesn't answer, the look on his face is one of skeptisism anddoubt.
It's silent for a beat
SLAM!The door is hit hard, Rooney flies across the room. Another smash andthe door gives way. Several vampires enter the doorway.
Ervintosses Rooney a piece of wood for a weapon. Just then the windowbarricade smashes apart and Randall is pulled outside.
Rooney
Iam going after Randall!
Ervin
Wait Rooney we need a plan!
Rooney
He'lldie!
Rooneysprings out the window. Ervin backs up as 5 vampires stalk him like apack of wolves, circling and surrounding him.
EXT– Outside the cabin window.
Randall is being dragged awayfrom the cabin by 2 vampires, they drag him a few feet and then turnon him, he kicks and claws at them in an attempt to break theirgrasp.
Rooney comes bounding out the window with a sharp chunkof wood in his hands. The vampires let Randall go.
ROONEY
Randall,RUN!
Randalltakes off into the woods. Rooney stands his ground as they start tostalk closer to him. They're within a few feet, Rooney hunkers downready or a fight, then looks at the small piece of wood thatconstitutes his only weapon and his look of confidence fades.
ROONEY
Randallwait UP!
Rooneybursts past the vampires and runs off in the direction that Randallwent.
INT – The cabin
The vampires growl and hissand close in on Ervin, Ervin removes his shirt and gets primal.
ERVIN
ComeON!
Thevampires close in on him, three hang back while two of them pounceson him. He kicks it in the chest and sends it flying, the other takeshim to the ground. It stands over him animalistically and shows himhis fangs. Ervin shoves the lighter in it's mouth and uppercuts it,the lighter explodes inside of it's mouth; lighting on fire.
Inan instant the other one is back on top of him and digs it's clawsinto his chest in a tight grip and pulls him close, as it bites downon his neck; Ervin screams loudly.
EXT– the woods – night
Randallis racing through the woods, he can hear that vampires are on histrail. He can hear Ervin scream in the background.
Randall
Ervin!
Hestops. He can hear something rushing towards him, it's too close forhim to do anything about. It's about to hit him, he braces.
ROONEY
RANDALLMOVE!!
Rooneybursts through the brush and grabs Randall, the pair sprint. Rightbehind Rooney are the two vampires. They run downhill, the vampiresare bloodthirsty and only paces behind them.
Randall
Rooneydo see that?
Upahead is a precipice, a long rigid drop off of a cliff and they'rerunning out of real estate as they bound closer and closer to it'sedge with the vampires hot on their heels.
Rooney
RANDALLCAN VAMPIRES FLY?
RANDALL
What?
ROONEY
CANVAMPIRES FLY??
RANDALL
NO!
ROONEY
Good
Rooneyruns off to the side, out of frame. Randall sees Rooney and turnstowards him to ask him where he's going, he stumbles and falls.Rolling right down to the bottom of the cliff near the edge. The twovampires are right on top of him. Randall stumbles to his feet andbacks up right to the edge of the cliff, the two vampires are in afrenzy and only feet away.
One leans over Randall and opensit's mouths, Something catches it's eye off camera and it's turn andgrowls. With the speed of hurdler Rooney comes flying feet first intothe vampire with a powerful boot right off the cliff.
Thesecond vampire springs onto Rooney and digs into him with it's claws,Rooney manages to kick it off of him and the vampire staggersbackward and trips over the still prone Randall and falls over theedge of the cliff.
The two men sit for a moment and catchtheir breath
Voiceon the Radio
'Your call is being forwarded to one of ouroperators, please stand by.'
Hello, please state your name andthe nature of your emergency.
Randall
This is RandallEdmonds, employee number 5846541-1 I have a government employee indanger and I need assistance immediately. Listen carefully, I needyou to access vehicle registration number G5EDD43 and do a manualoverride. I want you to set off it's alarm system for me. NOW.
Voiceon the Radio
One moment. I see this vehicle was signed out byRooney Rodman, I will have to fill out a 'failure of care' form whichI will need him to sign, a 'failure of care' report will remain onrecord for 6 months.
Randall
Sorry to add to your fileRooney
Thesound of an alarm screams, the two sit up quickly. The car is closeby.
INT - CABIN
Ervinis in a deadly fight with the remaining 5 vampires, he's not doingwell. The vampires surround him, he's badly hurt but still swinging.The blood that's pouring out of him is driving the vampires into afrenzy like a pack of hungry sharks, they fight over him which allowshim a moment's distraction. He readies his piece of shattered woodbehind his back.
The largest vampire wins the battle ofdominance and the right to eat Ervin, Ervin is on his knees and hasalmost nothing left, the vampire grabs him by the throat and getsnose to nose with him. He senses Ervin is resigned to his fate andgoes in for the kill.
Ervin grabs the vamps by the back ofthe head and pulls him closer, in one swift motion he plunges thestake upwards into the vampire's chest. It lets out an agonized howland explodes.
Ervin falls back, the other vampires areexcited and all move on him.
The room lights up, the vampirescringe. It's not the sun, it's headlights from a car. The headlightsilluminate the two figures standing in front, silhouetted from thelight.
They're strapped from head to toe, literally coveredin guns and weaponry. Ervin raises his head with the last of hisenergy, and looks up at them. The guns charge up with a high pitchedhum. Ervin crawls towards thelight, he's out of it.
Ervin
Areyou angels?
Rooney
Yes.
Randall
Ervinwe've got doctors on standby, don't move. Rooney, four targets.
Rooney
4
Heblasts one which explodes and covers the walls in bright red gore,then does the same with the others.
Rooney
3
2
Helines up the last vampire
Rooney
1
Thevampire screeches violently at him before springing forth in hisdirection, Rooney falls back and blasts. The explosion of guts coverhim again.
Ervinpasses out, when he wakes up he's in a hospital bed. He sees Rooneybeside him.
INT– RECOVERY ROOM
Ervin
Rooney...youstayed with me?
Rooney
No,I was just leaving actually. I was here to check on Randall.
Ervin
Howis he?
Rooney
Betterthan you, he only got bit once.
Rooneyturns to leave again
Rooney
Iam heading home, I was the only one to come out of this withoutneeding a sick leave so I am being rewarded with an early, doubleshift tomorrow.
Ervin
Sorry man.
Rooney
HeyIrvin...keep an eye on Randall, check in on him.
Ervin
He'sfine
Rooneyis looking into the hall transfixed on something, he sees a secondvision of Randall dead, bloodied and staring back at him.
Ervin
You don't have to worry about him.
***EDIT OCTOBER 7th 2012 - upon reading this again I gave it a rethink, if I ever come to revise this I would completely revamp it. I would rewrite it like this:
Rooney, Ervin and Randall are chased into a small cabin by a pack of vampires and Randall has been bitten. They can hold up until sunset when the vampires would retreat but if they do that then Randall would die and become one of them. He needs the vampire virus cure which is in the standard DOPE medical kit in their car and he needs it ASAP.
Rooney and Randall risk certain death at the hands of a ravenous pack of wild vampires. Electing to save their friend Ervin constructs a plan to draw the attention of the vampires from within the cabin allowing Rooney to escape out back. Rooney has to race through a kilometer of vampire territory at night to find their car and get it back to Ervin who was left to fortify and protect the cabin from a pack of strong and frenzied vampires who are determined to tear their way inside where Randall lays helpless and dying on the floor; bound to turn into a deadly vampire himself at any minute.
Well I was off for a couple weeks, I was sick AND I had to do some stupid test.
The important thing is that NO ONE missed me because NO ONE reads this...why would they?
Here's my final bit of my story, I did some more revisions that won't show in this blog. Again, this blog is just to get me writing on a more frequent basis, everything else is gravy.
APE
Ervin passes out, when he wakes up he's in a hospital
bed. He sees Rooney beside him.
Ervin
Rooney...you stayed
with me.
Rooney
No, I was just leaving actually. I was here to check
on Randall.
Ervin
How is he?
Rooney
Better than you actually, he only got bit once.
Rooney turns to leave again
Rooney
I am heading home, because I was the only one to come
out of this without needing a sick leave I am being rewarded with an
early, double shift tomorrow.
Ervin
Sorry man.
Rooney
Hey Irvin...keep an eye on Randall, check in on
him.
Ervin
He's fine
Rooney is looking into the hall
trasfixed on something, he sees a second vision of Randall dead,
bloodied and staring back at him
Well, this next week is going to be really busy up until about Friday. I have a boring, torturous test to study for and I am hating every minute of it.
Also through talking about the big picture of the show I am writing for, some ideas have come to light that need to thread their way through each script. That means huge revisions to what I already wrote.
Back to this awful test, this is a sentence from the book, every sentence is like this, it's arduous.
Convertible preferreds are similar to convertible bonds and debentures because they enable the holder to convert the preferred into some other class of shares (usually common) at a predetermined price and for a stated.....ugggg. F' off.
I am almost finished my first rough run on this, normally I'd go through it all once more and make final changes before anyone saw it (since no one reads this that's pretty much what I am doing anyway). I've already made changes to my script that don't appear in this blog, when I am totally finished I'll post my final first draft.
I am not too crazy about any of what I am about to post today but it's always better to just get something written even if you don't like it. It's a lot easier to revise something than it is to write it from a blank page, there's something about a blank page that saps motivation to write and stifles your thinking process. Get some black on that screen and work from there.
---------------------
APE
The
second vampire springs onto Rooney and digs into him with it's claws,
Rooney manages to kick it off of him and the vampire staggers backward
and trips over the still prone Randall and falls over the edge of the
cliff.
The two men sit for a moment and catch their breath
Voice on the Radio 'Your call is being forwarded to one of our operators, please stand by.'
Hello, please state your name and the nature of your emergency.
Randall
This is Randall Edmonds, employee number 5846541-1 I have a government
employee in danger and I need assistance immediately. Listen carefully,
I need you to access vehicle registration number G5EDD43 and do a
manual override. I want you to set off it's alarm system for me. NOW.
Voice on the Radio
One moment. I see this vehicle was signed out by Rooney Rodman, I will
have to fill out a 'failure of care' form which I will need him to sign,
a 'failure of care' report will remain on record for 6 months.
Randall Sorry to add to your file Rooney
Rooney
sigh...just do it.
The sound of an alarm screams, the two sit up quickly. The car is close by.
INT - CABIN
Ervin is in a deadly fight with the
remaining 5 vampires, he's not doing well. The vampires surround him,
he's badly hurt but still swinging. The blood that's pouring out of him
is driving the vampires into a frenzy like a pack of hungry sharks, they
fight over him which allows him a moment's distraction. He readies his
piece of shattered wood behind his back.
The largest vampire wins the battle of dominance and the right to eat
Ervin, Ervin is on his knees and has almost nothing left, the vampire
grabs him by the throat and gets nose to nose with him. He senses Ervin is resigned to his fate and goes in for the kill.
Ervin grabs the vamps by the back of the head and pulls him closer, in
one swift motion he plunges the stake upwards into the vampire's chest.
It lets out an agonized howl and explodes.
Ervin falls back, the other vampires are excited and all move on him.
The room lights up, the vampires cringe. It's not the sun, it's
headlights from a car. The headlights illuminate the two figures
standing in front, silhouetted from the light.
They're strapped from head to toe, literally covered in guns and
weaponry. Ervin raises his head with the last of his energy, and looks
up at them. The guns charge up with a high pitched hum.
So I am writing most of this using Office Suite X and it's being a straight BITCH! It links all paragraphs together so if I want one line of dialogue to be center aligned and then want one line of action to be right aligned it's not letting that happen. If I change one it changes the other. If I hit enter a thousand times it doesn't make a different. F'n annoying is what it is.
EXT – the woods – night
Randall
is racing through the woods, he can hear that vampires are on his
trail. They hear Ervin scream in the background.
Randall Ervin!
He stops. He can hear something rushing towards him, it's too
close for him to do anything about. It's about to hit him, he braces.
ROONEY RANDALL MOVE!!
Rooney bursts through the brush and grabs Randall, the pair
sprint. Right behind Rooney are the two vampires. They run downhill,
the vampires are bloodthirsty and only paces behind them.
Randall Rooney do see that?
Up ahead is a precipice, a long rigid drop off of a cliff and
their running out of real estate as they bound closer and closer to
it's edge with the vampires hot on their heels.
Rooney RANDALL
CAN VAMPIRES FLY?
RANDALL What?
ROONEY CAN
VAMPIRES FLY??
RANDALL NO!
ROONEY Good
Rooney
trips Randall who goes tumbling right to the bottom, right to the
edge of the cliff. Rooney runs off to the side, out of frame. The two
vampires are right on top of him. Randall stumbles to his feet and
backs up right to the edge of the cliff, the two vampires are in a
frenzy and only feet away.
One leans over Randall and opens
it's mouths, Something catches it's eye off camera and it's turn and
growls. With the speed of hurdler Rooney comes flying feet first into
the vampire with a powerful boot right off the cliff.
Randall is being dragged away
from the cabin by 2 vampires, they drag him a few feet and then turn
on him, he kicks and claws at them in an attempt to break their
grasp.
Rooney comes bounding out the window with a sharp chunk
of wood in his hands. The vampires let Randall go.
ROONEY Randall,
RUN!
Randall
takes off into the woods. Rooney stands his ground as they start to
stalk closer to him. They're within a few feet, Rooney hunkers down
ready or a fight, then looks at the small piece of wood that
constitutes his only weapon and his look of confidence fade.
ROONEY Randall
wait UP!
Rooney
bursts past the vampires and runs off in the direction that Randall
went.
INT – The cabin
The vampires growl and hiss
and close in on Ervin, Ervin removes his shirt and gets primal.
ERVIN Come
ON!
The
vampires close in on him, three hang back while two of them pounce on
him. He kicks one in the chest and sends it flying, the other takes
him to the ground. It stands over him animalistically and shows him
his fangs. Ervin shoves the lighter in it's mouth and uppercuts it,
the lighter explodes inside of it's mouth; lighting on fire.
In an instant the
other one is back on top of him and digs it's claws into his chest in
a tight grip and pulls him close, as it bites down on his neck; Ervin
screams loudly.
