TOM WRITES HIS FIRST MOVIE: Go back and fix crap.

So I finally read over what I have so far, I feel like I am missing a scene. I need something to help build up this tension that's set to boil over between my couple.

Hence, today's page. I'll sandwich it in somewhere near the beginning.

INT - KITCHEN

A pot boils on the stove.

DOUGLAS

Ok, throw them in.

Abby is holding two large lobsters.

ABBY

I am having second thoughts.

Douglas laughs.

DOUGLAS

I knew this was going to happen. I told you in the store. I knew you'd bond with them by the time we got home.

ABBY

Arrrrgggg...I really want lobster too.

Abby looks at the two lobsters, all tied up and at her mercy. 

ABBY

Uggg...why did I name them?

DOUGLAS

Why don't you give them to me and leave the room.

ABBY

Nooooo. I know what you're going to do with them.

DOUGLAS

I am going to cook them. That's why we bought them Abby, you were so excited in the store.

ABBY

I knowwwwwww...I am being weird. 

DOUGLAS

Can I have them?

ABBY

No.

Douglas's body language registers frustration but on him face is a big smile. He can't get mad at that.

DOUGLAS

You know we can't keep two pet lobsters, right? They would just die anyway Abby.

ABBY

Why can't we just let them go? We can take them to the lake.

DOUGLAS

Abbbbbbbyyyyyyy...this is adorable but I really don't want to do that. This was my dinner too, I was excited.

ABBY

 But think about how mean that is. Peter and Pepper will thank us, we can save them. It'll be like a Disney movie. The first half of the movie will be about how they got caught and forced to survive in that aquarium at the restaurant. Watching their friends being chosen and then eaten in front of them. 

DOUGLAS

This is dark.

ABBY

Yeah! And then it gets really dark when a young couple comes into the restaurant and chooses both of them. At least they get to die together; they think.

DOUGLAS

Jeez.

ABBY

But then at the last minute the couple looks at them and see's how in love they are and how scared, so they decide to let them go. They give them a  new life in a beautiful lake with lots of food. All because they had a last minute change of heart.

DOUGLAS

I am not sold. Do you even know for sure they they're a boy and girl?

Abby doesn't.

ABBY

(unconvincingly)

Yes.

DOUGLAS

Abby you're cute. But I want to eat these guys.

ABBY

Oh come on. You love animals as much as I do.

DOUGLAS

Yeah?

ABBY

And I don't see you being able to eat Petey and Pepper, now that...

Douglas takes them away from Abby and puts them right into the boiling pot in one cold motion.

DOUGLAS

Wanna bet?

Abby is shocked. She can't believe that Douglas could be that callous. 

The pot screams.

INT - THE KITCHEN TABLE

Douglas as Abby sit across from each other at the table, not speaking. Douglas is enjoying his lobster, Abby hasn't touched hers.

Cont'd...

WTF?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

I just found the weirdest little side note to a story.

I am sitting here reading a wikipedia page about an old Egyptian army that went missing in the desert because that's the kind of thing I do and something really jumped out at me. It was the words "severed penis". I thought "heh...weird, I wasn't expecting that to come into play". The accompanying explanation was weirder than I thought...I thought maybe they were chopping off their penises (I just learned I had no idea what the plural of the word 'penis' was) for ceremonial reasons. I knew I was reading an article about a lost ancient Egyptian army and I knew severed penises (or penii) were a part of this story in some way and my mind's first conclusion was that of a weird, ancient penis ceremony where they chop them off, maybe as a sacrifice to the gods. That wasn't it.

In November 2009, two Italian archaeologists, Angelo and Alfredo Castiglioni, announced the discovery of human remains, tools and weapons which date to the era of the Persian army. These artifacts were located near Siwa Oasis.^[16] According to these two archaeologists this is the first archaeological evidence of the story reported by Herodotus. While working in the area, the researchers noticed a half-buried pot and some human remains. Then the brothers spotted something really intriguing—what could have been a natural shelter. It was a rock about 35 meters (115 feet) long, 1.8 meters (5.9 feet) high and 3 meters (9.8 feet) deep. Such natural formations occur in the desert, but this large rock was the only one in a large area.^[17]

However, these "two Italian archaeologists" presented their discoveries in a film rather than a scientific journal. Doubts have been raised because the Castiglioni brothers also happen to be the two filmmakers who produced five controversial African shockumentaries in the 1970s—including Addio ultimo uomo, Africa ama, and Africa dolce e selvaggia—films in which audiences saw unedited footage of the severing of a penis, the skinning of a human corpse, the deflowering of a girl with a stone phallus, and a group of hunters tearing apart an elephant’s carcass.^[18]

The Secretary General of the Egyptian Supreme Council of Antiquities, Zahi Hawass, has said in a press release that media reports of this "are unfounded and misleading" and that "The Castiglioni brothers have not been granted permission by the SCA to excavate in Egypt, so anything they claim to find is not to be believed."^[19]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cambyses_II#The_lost_army_of_Cambyses

Why? Why didn't I have the 'safe search' turned on when I googled "penis ritual"?